Insight + Action = Results

I've been breaking my commitment to myself to be transparent during the process of building my coaching practice.  But as I've learned in the past months, though commitment is often viewed as a single event in time, it's often more useful to think of commitment as a series of recommitments.

So I recommit to sharing my experiences. :)

The recent months have been hard for me.  My teachers, teammates and coach have me considering that view -- that life is hard -- as a choice, and indeed I see that there are different choices available, yet making a different choice is far from easy.  My intention in sharing is to have you know that when you hit this point in whatever it is you are doing, there is nothing right or wrong about it.  It's merely an experience.

Since I began coaching in July 2010, I have coached 15 clients privately, and more as a part of my training program.  Not bad, huh?

I have passed through the different stages of building a business -- I've found pro bono clients, reduced-rate/partial-pay clients, and I've secured full pay clients.  Each stage was difficult for me and pushed me out of my comfort zone.  But I did it.  I worked through my discomfort and got the result I wanted.

And now I sit at another point of discomfort, way outside my comfort zone.  I just want to work with more people -- my sincerest dream is that they will fall from the sky into my lap -- but this is not how it's going to go for me.  Not because it's impossible or unrealistic as a concept, but because it's impossible and unrealistic for me at this moment.

What do I mean?

I'm tired.  I'm discouraged.  I'm down.

And I'm just doing all of the things I would normally do when in this state -- I'm beating myself up ("you're such a loser, who's going to hire you?"), I'm sensitive to complaining and negativity ("holy crap, do people ever stop complaining!?") and I want to isolate myself ("I don't want anyone to see me like this -- what kind of coach would I be if I showed people my stuff?")

In this state of mind and being, it is literally impossible for me to have clients fall into my lap.  I simply won't allow it.  In this act of writing and sharing my feelings, I believe that it will push people away from me.  So it will.  Now, at this moment.

But that doesn't mean that there is anything wrong or bad or valueless about me writing this.

It's just an experience.  And perhaps it's the experience that you need to read to propel you forward in your life.

At a later time, (maybe even 5 seconds after I complete this article), it will be realistic for me to have clients fall from the sky, because my state of being will allow it to be possible.

Or perhaps it will inspire you to contact me and hire me as your coach...

And what is the difference between me having this run through my head and not express it versus write it on a blog for others to see?

Writing is an action that I'm taking.  An action to shift myself from being an isolated, lonely, terrified person, to being a fully expressed, connected and loving man.

Insight + Action = Results.